I'm trying to write something, but it's not working out. I like when the blog has a mixture of discussion, thoughtful, and review posts, but these days I can't seem to get inspiration for writing anything remotely interesting.
There are ideas I have. I kind of want to write about how I feel like adults have taken over the YA world a little, but the idea isn't fully developed yet. I keep reading my thoughts and saying, "Nope, that's wrong. You can't say that. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?"
I am definitely my harshest critic.
There was also a post on drama, and how it's not necessary for YA bloggers, but to be honest, the post went "I've never encountered drama, and it's not a requirement of blogging," and it ended right there.
Yuck. So this is a writing exercise that you may or may not see (depending on what Mari thinks). This is me writing out my block.
See, when other people get block, I assume they do something like try to inspire themselves by visiting other blogs, or watching a movie. They may even leave the screen blank in despair. I've tried writing three to four different posts in the past few weeks, and finally, I got sick of it. I refuse to have writing block. So now, it can go away.
I just need a topic that is semi-interesting and that hasn't been covered before. Like.... (Well, if I knew, we wouldn't be having this conversation. Wait. I swear I know this isn't a conversation.)
A normal person would leave the computer when they have clearly nothing of substance to say, but I refuse to do that. I feel like if I get these words out, maybe they can clear up some space for some actual interesting words.
I feel like I'm in limbo. I'm done my summatives, and now I just need to do my exams. I'm learning nothing new in school. Theoretically, we should be studying right now but I don't want to study. I honestly am not terrified over any of these marks. Like, I'm done with these classes. Can I just start new ones already?
And I've sent in my university applications. All that needs to happen is for more schools to accept me. There's a mixture of confidence and absolute despair going on in my head. What if I don't get accepted? What if I do? It's debatable which is scarier.
This post may be one of the stupidest things I've ever written, but guess what: it works. Writing block is something everyone has experienced, and everyone has a theory on. I know there is especially a lot of talk on what to do when you're an author and you have writer's block (which sounds terrifying, because that's your job and writer's block means you're incapable of doing it) so here's how I get through it.
This. I have writer's block when I have a vision, but no understanding of the process. I want so badly to write that perfect post that everyone will enjoy. I want to touch people's hearts. I want to inspire people. I want to make a name for myself.
These desires are almost paralyzing my ability to write, because writing is free flowing and all over the place, and I never really know where my posts are going until they're done. I'm dealing with a lot of stress and guilt because I'm totally procrastinating right now, which is awful because I need high marks for university. Doing a post like this: rambly, with no aim, mostly my opinions with some tenuous link to blogging thrown in helps me because I'm doing exactly what I was scared to do.
I'm allowing myself to write. This post may never be read by anyone, and I'm pretty sure in a month when someone reads it and comments I'll feel pretty bad because a lot can change in a month (or maybe nothing will- Hello, future me!) but the biggest thing in my writing that I need to connect with is me. I want to write honestly, and this, while not structured or polished, is 100% me. Unapologetically.
(Who am I kidding, I'm so sorry I wasted your time on this mess of a post.)
(Mari says pass!)
(Oh, and I hope you guys enjoyed my artistic work. I was too lazy to search for appropriate images so I made my own. Do you like it or should I stick with stock images?)